Well Ladies and Gents the summer weather is here in full force and all of us have dipped into are new and old summer threads.
Just as a lot of people do I like to walk and enjoy the scenery around me and appreciate every last moment of this weather inspite of the MASSIVE heat we have been experiencing. Whether I am walking, biking, blading or driving. I enjoy people watching.
Amongst my travels I have noticed people have made the move from sneakers to sandals and who can blame anyone for that.
You have your slingbacks, thong, clogs and slip on's to name a few. But folks we have some sandals do's and dont's to address for the next time you decide to dawn the sandals.
LADIES:
DON'T.....I REPEAT DO NOT wear nylons with sandals it looks ridiculous and defeats the purpose of wearing open toe shoes. There is nothing worse than looking at a pair of feet with renforcement on the toe and ladies don't be fooled by the sandalfoot stockings they are just as ridiculous and don't think we are not laughing at the one line going across you toe. IT IS HILARIOUS
Do get a nice pedicure- the most repulsing thing to see is a nice pair of shoes with feet looking like something you would see on the X-Files. EWWWW!!!!
The average cost for a pedicure is $30.00 which may be a lot these days ladies you do have options:
Option 1 you can walk around with that hang nail coming off you BIG toe with the toe jam not to far or you can walk into walmart and pick up a pair of clippers and get rid of that for $1.49
Option 2 you can walk around with your heels looking like the skin of a lizard and sounding like sandpaper or you can walk into your local drug store and pick up a pumice stone and some cream. $2.49 for both.
Option 3 Nailpolish if you are going to wear pretty shoes how about a nice pretty color to accent your new shoes. The worse thing is looking at a nice pair of shoes with a plain pair of feet can head to the dollarstore and pick out a nice color for $1.00.
Finally if you are painting your toes- STAY IN THE LINES.
There you have it a pedicure for dummies under $10.00
Next we move on to buying the right type of sandals. If you are going to buy a pair of shoes please make sure your toes are not hanging from the edge and if they are it mean the shoe is not fitting. The same rule applys to the heel dragging at the back. If the shoe FITS wear it if not keep your sneakers on.
Ok Guys don't think you are getting off that easy!
Guys if you are going to breakout the burkinstocks put away the SOCKS!!!
If you are going to wear sandals make sure you borrow your mates $1.49 cream there is nothing worse that walking behind you thinking it is a stone in my shoe when it is just layers of your deadskin coming off. YUCK.
For some of you more daring men go ahead and use my guide and give yourself the pedicure for dummies It is ok really. Nobody is going to know if that is your beef. How many guys really sit on a patio and say DUDE nice toes.
Well folks there you have it Just some helpful tips for the next time you want to put on those flip flops.
So go ahead strut your stuff.....and please clean em up your feet will thank you
and so will the on lookers
Sunday, June 26, 2005
Friday, June 24, 2005
Sloppy Sleepers
Many of us have several means of getting to work mine is the Go Train this is a 30 min commute everyday so that I can make it into work at a reasonable time
7:00 am to be percise. Call it executive hours but it is worth every bit of deprived sleep that I get. :)
So on my daily commute I have my designated Go Train Car that I sit in I get my morning paper and see what is happening in our world today and I think why do I even need a paper to when there is so much entertainment right before my eyes. In 30min I observe so many interesting things. It is like a mini Soap Opera.
One typical thing that happens on the train is quite often people fall asleeep perhaps it is the motion of the train, a long day staring at a PC or just plain tiredness.
I have noticed that Go Train Sleeping comes in many forms.
You have your typical sleeping passenger- head tilted to one side but then all of a sudden kurplunk the head goes forward at a really quick rate and the passenger is suddenley awaken and looking around to see who has noticed. Then there is me trying so hard not to laugh.
Next you have the sleeping Go Train passenger who has there head right back and mouth WIDE open and I feel inspired to have a game of spit ball.........
Next you have the Go Train Passenger who reads to aviod sleeping and by page 2 BOOM the head is forward with the book wide open almost falling out of the hands and EYES glued shut and there I am dying to GRAB that book and YELL GET UP!!!
Next you have the sleeping passenger who is wearing a walkman but yet manages to still sleep. I am ok with that as long as I can hear the song playing and it is a good one.
Another amusing passenger is the one that takes there shoes and socks off and feet up on the seat. What is this your living room? Please put those shoes back on you are making me GAG!
So that is my take on all the sloppy sleepers.......that I have to see on a daily basis and all I have to say is go to BED early you all look ridiculous.
That's the real deal
7:00 am to be percise. Call it executive hours but it is worth every bit of deprived sleep that I get. :)
So on my daily commute I have my designated Go Train Car that I sit in I get my morning paper and see what is happening in our world today and I think why do I even need a paper to when there is so much entertainment right before my eyes. In 30min I observe so many interesting things. It is like a mini Soap Opera.
One typical thing that happens on the train is quite often people fall asleeep perhaps it is the motion of the train, a long day staring at a PC or just plain tiredness.
I have noticed that Go Train Sleeping comes in many forms.
You have your typical sleeping passenger- head tilted to one side but then all of a sudden kurplunk the head goes forward at a really quick rate and the passenger is suddenley awaken and looking around to see who has noticed. Then there is me trying so hard not to laugh.
Next you have the sleeping Go Train passenger who has there head right back and mouth WIDE open and I feel inspired to have a game of spit ball.........
Next you have the Go Train Passenger who reads to aviod sleeping and by page 2 BOOM the head is forward with the book wide open almost falling out of the hands and EYES glued shut and there I am dying to GRAB that book and YELL GET UP!!!
Next you have the sleeping passenger who is wearing a walkman but yet manages to still sleep. I am ok with that as long as I can hear the song playing and it is a good one.
Another amusing passenger is the one that takes there shoes and socks off and feet up on the seat. What is this your living room? Please put those shoes back on you are making me GAG!
So that is my take on all the sloppy sleepers.......that I have to see on a daily basis and all I have to say is go to BED early you all look ridiculous.
That's the real deal
Thursday, June 23, 2005
Save The Music
Led Zeplin
The Who
The Rolling Stones
Tina Turner
Madonna
Aretha Frankin
The Beatles
Prince
All of these musicians have been around form the 1960's to the present and each one has been a pioneer in music history.
So I ask you this question Where are the pioneers of today?
Rare to find because they do not exist. Why because the face of music has changed from keeping it real to a mass media marketing ploy that does not foucs on the talent but all the BLING BLING and ways to keep the Bling coming into the pockets of these stars at the expense of the fans.
We have the fans who spend there hard earned cash buying concert tickets and expecting a live performance from there favorite icon.
Only to be manipulated by a mic that is off and lots of costumes and a huge stage set. If that is what I want I will go and see a play at least I know the actors are real.
How can we buy into this? It sends a message that we are willing to settle for less when our minds and ears and wallets should be opened for people who really earn it.
So if you hear a CD you like get out there buy it and if you feel inspired for a second do not give up on your dream. Create it and get it out there you never know who you will touch and inspire call me a dreamer but you may even be the next pioneer that changes the face of music.
Otherwise we are going to be stuck watching syndicated episodes of Nick and Jessica, Brittany and Kevin, Carem and Dave. Pimp my ride The Osbournes( but you gotta love OZZY)
KEEP IT REAL! Open your mind and EARS!
That's The Real DEAL
The Who
The Rolling Stones
Tina Turner
Madonna
Aretha Frankin
The Beatles
Prince
All of these musicians have been around form the 1960's to the present and each one has been a pioneer in music history.
So I ask you this question Where are the pioneers of today?
Rare to find because they do not exist. Why because the face of music has changed from keeping it real to a mass media marketing ploy that does not foucs on the talent but all the BLING BLING and ways to keep the Bling coming into the pockets of these stars at the expense of the fans.
We have the fans who spend there hard earned cash buying concert tickets and expecting a live performance from there favorite icon.
Only to be manipulated by a mic that is off and lots of costumes and a huge stage set. If that is what I want I will go and see a play at least I know the actors are real.
How can we buy into this? It sends a message that we are willing to settle for less when our minds and ears and wallets should be opened for people who really earn it.
So if you hear a CD you like get out there buy it and if you feel inspired for a second do not give up on your dream. Create it and get it out there you never know who you will touch and inspire call me a dreamer but you may even be the next pioneer that changes the face of music.
Otherwise we are going to be stuck watching syndicated episodes of Nick and Jessica, Brittany and Kevin, Carem and Dave. Pimp my ride The Osbournes( but you gotta love OZZY)
KEEP IT REAL! Open your mind and EARS!
That's The Real DEAL
Sunday, June 19, 2005
Corporate Venom
Sorry I have been gone for a while......
I am here to talk about a highly contagious illness that has been spreading and infecting our work force on a daily basis it is called CORPORATE VENOM. This is all the Snakes slithering around the corportate workplace wating to release there venom.
Now that I have your attention you may have a few questions....
Q)What are the symptoms of corporate venom?
A) It starts with a simple hello, how are you? Then it is followed by lets do coffee this is in the week one phase.
Week 2 it becomes Lets Do lunch?
Week 3 Do you need some help with that report you are working on? It is no problem really?
Week 3 Lets go for Drinks afterwork?
Week 4 So how long have you been married? How long have you been dating? Where did you go to school? Where did you get that dress? Lets go Shopping.
So what do you think about the new girl? Can you belive she did that?
While in week 4 these all may seem like harmless questions BE WARE!!!
Then before you know it here they come trying fish for information about your personal life and once they get a hook. Look out! You are reeled in.
Q) How Can I been sure that I have the illness?
A) On Monday morning you will be the discussion at the Water Cooler and by lunch time the whole office will have the latest eddtion on what you do who you do it with...Along with there personal fabrications things you did not say will become things you did say with various fictional twists.
and.... There you have it you are now Infected with Corporate Venom
Q) What is the best treatment for this illness?
A) Avoid the nosey Nancy's and say as little as possible about your business unless it is work business. If that makes you a social outcast so be it. It is better to be protected then infected. Otherwise this will lead to a non productive workday infected by lies and fabrication and you will find youself blending into the same world of Slithering Snakes.
Q) What if someone really is trying to be nice to me how can I be sure this is not Corporate venom?
A) Don' be fooled this type of infection comes in many different disguises for example you have the eager beaver always wanting to help and not wanting anything in return ( ya right?). The Calm and Quiet this is a hard one to see right away it may seem like they do not say a lot but believe me they hear everything and are typing an email as you speak. Then you have the one who is hard to put a finger on....The best finger to point is in the opposite direction.
Q) Why would my life be of interest to someone that does not know me?
A) A person(s) who is unfufiled desiered or acknowledged in there own life gets sufficient pleasure in interfering with issues that are not there concern
Q)Why?
A) For 10min of acknowledgement it is worth every last fabricated word and Now finally someone is listening or paying attention to them even though it is based on a lie. This is pretty sad but a harsh reality
So there you have it folks a brief overview of corporate venom and how it can be a toxicity your system and create serious hazardsto your mental state of mind.
The best thing to do is to say as little as possible about your personal life and keep your circle of friends outside of the workforce. Seems a little drastic but if you want peace of mind and calm working environment then really this is the only choice you have. Unless you choose to conform and be a carrier of corporate venom which means
"YOU REALLY NEED TO GET A LIFE"
That's The Real Deal
I am here to talk about a highly contagious illness that has been spreading and infecting our work force on a daily basis it is called CORPORATE VENOM. This is all the Snakes slithering around the corportate workplace wating to release there venom.
Now that I have your attention you may have a few questions....
Q)What are the symptoms of corporate venom?
A) It starts with a simple hello, how are you? Then it is followed by lets do coffee this is in the week one phase.
Week 2 it becomes Lets Do lunch?
Week 3 Do you need some help with that report you are working on? It is no problem really?
Week 3 Lets go for Drinks afterwork?
Week 4 So how long have you been married? How long have you been dating? Where did you go to school? Where did you get that dress? Lets go Shopping.
So what do you think about the new girl? Can you belive she did that?
While in week 4 these all may seem like harmless questions BE WARE!!!
Then before you know it here they come trying fish for information about your personal life and once they get a hook. Look out! You are reeled in.
Q) How Can I been sure that I have the illness?
A) On Monday morning you will be the discussion at the Water Cooler and by lunch time the whole office will have the latest eddtion on what you do who you do it with...Along with there personal fabrications things you did not say will become things you did say with various fictional twists.
and.... There you have it you are now Infected with Corporate Venom
Q) What is the best treatment for this illness?
A) Avoid the nosey Nancy's and say as little as possible about your business unless it is work business. If that makes you a social outcast so be it. It is better to be protected then infected. Otherwise this will lead to a non productive workday infected by lies and fabrication and you will find youself blending into the same world of Slithering Snakes.
Q) What if someone really is trying to be nice to me how can I be sure this is not Corporate venom?
A) Don' be fooled this type of infection comes in many different disguises for example you have the eager beaver always wanting to help and not wanting anything in return ( ya right?). The Calm and Quiet this is a hard one to see right away it may seem like they do not say a lot but believe me they hear everything and are typing an email as you speak. Then you have the one who is hard to put a finger on....The best finger to point is in the opposite direction.
Q) Why would my life be of interest to someone that does not know me?
A) A person(s) who is unfufiled desiered or acknowledged in there own life gets sufficient pleasure in interfering with issues that are not there concern
Q)Why?
A) For 10min of acknowledgement it is worth every last fabricated word and Now finally someone is listening or paying attention to them even though it is based on a lie. This is pretty sad but a harsh reality
So there you have it folks a brief overview of corporate venom and how it can be a toxicity your system and create serious hazardsto your mental state of mind.
The best thing to do is to say as little as possible about your personal life and keep your circle of friends outside of the workforce. Seems a little drastic but if you want peace of mind and calm working environment then really this is the only choice you have. Unless you choose to conform and be a carrier of corporate venom which means
"YOU REALLY NEED TO GET A LIFE"
That's The Real Deal
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